You Can't Hide Those Lion Eyes

Not a fan of Country Western music, but I can't look at this without thinking of that song.....anyway - not finished, I have to do somethin' not sure what. I feel frozen. Angst. Overwhelmed with life. Can't sleep. Wish I couldn't eat. No desire to drink, that helped for a while. Sigh. Paint some more, but I'm frozen. Got the 2:00 a.m. bluuuuues. Bob Dylan was here, I couldn't afford the tickets. Had a wonderful show at the Artel "far out " Gallery last Friday night. Such a nice time.

Cry Me A River . . .

Working on this painting for a show called "The Pretenders" - the colors are really much more vibrant......

Going into Dog Days

Not much to offer anyone, but some hellos, fond thoughts, and a bit of news, not much. Not that much is lacking in life, I am at an overload, my mother fails bit by bit, my time is dedicated to a summer of being a full time - grand-mom and telephone cheerleader to my mother, although I did go out for two weeks, but it wasn't long enough. Funds are at zero and I try not to add worry to my pile of straw, lest it all begin to kindle and burn. Almost reminds me of my single parent days except back then I had quite a few less people telling me how I should be taking care of all these things, while they stand on the sidelines, doing their own thing, and judging how I am doing all of these things. So my mood swings from grouchy to optimistic, a lot depending on the amount of pain I am in, or my exhaustion level, or the nagging that comes my way. I am reminded though, that I am blessed - I can do much more than a lot of people I know my age.

Still also busy with the Gallery and all it entails, and just entered an art show at the "edgiest" gallery in town that is very hard to jury in, and two of my works were chosen and I was quite flattered to even get in an art show with Kreg Yingst - an awesome and well known artist on a national level. I entered the above and one from my morose period, called "Lament."

My calendar is very full almost every day and I need to paint more. But God knows that.

Its hot here - don't know if its any hotter than usual, but it feels like it - many days over 100 F and very humid. I have ceased walking outside - opting for the elliptical, not as often as I should, and continuing on at "Curves" - but it makes me feel better.

The dogs continue to be crazy fun, and the cats have finally accepted them and we have a communal bed, I scratch fleas along with them - it is hard keeping up with dog upkeep - they are NOT like cats, definitely.

So lots more, yet not - - - it 'tis what it 'tis - going to watch the Kim Clement broadcast now.

B b b b b Blue Monday..........

My granddaughter and I - and yes, I look tired out of my mind. It is totally attributed to the fact, that I am indeed very tired. Too much going on and hubby has taken a vacation from helping with anything. Nothing new to report but grueling family matters - and I have to take a trip to Wyoming for a couple of weeks to assess my mother's situation.

Now, the owner of two Shih tsu dogs - which I am hopelessly fond of, travel is a bit more complicated.

The temps are often at 101 - 103 F, that is real temp, not heat index. And they say there is no global warming. Can't swim in the Gulf - too much controversy over the remaining oil and Corexit dispersant.

The below painting pretty well sums up my mind. Hmmm - yes, you must figure it out for yourself. :)

No TV now, but I do have net flix, so we are watching an occasional movie. Tomorrow we pack, and go buy some math workbooks, just to make grandson's summer a little more fun.

Memorial Day Weekend

Mush, You Huskies!

Raven Thinking

Three Monkeys

No recent what's happening now pictures. My camera software is malfunctioning and I have to upload on half dead desktop computer, so most pics are now posted to Facebook. There is by now, not much new. Gallery stuff - publicity for the Gallery and not enough painting, drawing, etc.....family concerns have tied me up greatly, and I've had company. Company has been wonderful, Stagg and Candy and my sister. Family concerns have been heavy. I'm trying to plan for Wyoming, however I can't quite get my act together. This weekend, right now, celebrating youngest grandson's birthday with him. 14!

A most momentous, triggered by financial concerns, but latent blessing has been turning off the TV service! My sister and I were talking about how nice silence sounds. Instead of TV I tend to watch the birds bathe in the animals' water bowl on the patio - listen to their comings and goings. Sound boring? Not to me. 'Tis a very odd "season" - devastating weather in parts of the country, sometimes insurmountable problems to work through - a jump into 2011? I don'tknow.

Love you all out there - even those who have fizzled out on posting - you are all still in my thoughts so often.

Thursday Coming Down - FAST!

New Charcoal!

I've been busy - too many art shows going on - Just finished one for a juried show that could bring some very nice prize money. (see above link). Hustling to do a drawing to sell to promote our only non-profit gallery, and trying to get enough prints made for my art show and to sell at the non-profit gallery on downtown Gallery Night. Yep, busy. Grandson went home for a few days and I miss him way too much.

It's probably hit the news - about 174 dead according to one report from so many tornadoes through the South. We were all ok, its just humid and cloudy most of the time - and it makes our 85 F. seem very hot - I guess the one tornado we had that time was enough of our share of them.

Trying to pick up the house some, my sister will come visit.

My mother continues to have lots of problems, thinking she has cancer, is going to have surgery and radiation, when none of the doctors say anything of the sort. I should go the end of June - the weather has me sort of crippled up and moving slowly, but at least the pneumonia/bronch - is a thing of the past - it seemed to get 1/3 of my energy from me and keep it though.

I must run - I'm out of coffee and I can't start the day without it!

Happy Easter

Some don't believe in Easter's foundations, but thinking of celebrations for this season, I believe one must respect other's beliefs. This is the one I celebrate, kind of mixed with a bit of passover as well. It's been an odd one in a way, no Easter outfits, or bunnies, nor baskets, none of the American traditions, no ham, no mashed potatoes, no after church brunch, no church. I did make a pink box cake today, we ate left overs from last night, and I missed the rest of my family. Yet I am glad they felt the freedom to celebrate (or not) on their own.

The above picture is an apt depiction of a wound of crucifixion.

I did go Friday to a most extraordinary service at the Metropolitan Community Church - it was called a Taise service and was quite moving. I never spoke to anyone, nor anyone to me - Christ was preeminent and the message of Christ. I wept through the whole thing and felt incredible when it was over.

So that notwithstanding, I am fighting a major painter's block. Ugh - have to break through now that I'm committed!!!! There is so much going on, I'm thinking if I do not develop a workable routine I will have to resign from the Gallery's Board as Publicity Director in order to have time to paint.

Summer! Full bloom here - in the 80's - that's F. Humid. Green, so green. Hibiscus blooming - I am so behind in planting, yard work, its crazy, but my sister is coming and we will dig and plant and continue the garage cleaning that Stagg and Candy so aptly began for us. One of the palms has split which is rare and I'm watching it with interest. Earth Mother I am.

Youngest grandson is going to Orlando with a select choir to sing at Disneyworld. His mom is going with him, they are so excited!! Oldest grandson graduated from IT Tech last month. Granddaughter is finding her way - deep thinking and definitely a free spirit, will be fun to watch her enter adulthood. She will be 17 next week - scary - I got married when I was 17. She has better sense.

My car has taken to falling apart the last two months, expensive falling a parts! Hope this recent transmission trouble is the last of it. It only has 66,000 and Buicks are supposed to be workhorses. Dunno.

My mother has been sick, probably is on the decline towards death, she thinks any moment, but it could possibly be another year as well. She had a reaction to a flu shot which uncovered some clots in her lungs. They are gone, but she has been fighting some fluid in her lung. She wants me to come out and take care of her. Moving in or getting an apartment for a few years or 20 plus years is not an option for me. I keep in touch with her doctors and if she really needs me, then I will go - but not until then, other than a standard visit. I don't know anyone else my age that visits there mother 2000 miles away every year. I think I can count the actual vacations, holidays I've taken in my life on one hand. So I don't feel selfish.

I am so thankful for such a fabulous year last year - it helps bear this one!

Well, that's it for now - nice to be blogging again - Facebook is really irritating me. Long story.

I think I've lost all my Bspot readers - but life changes, ebbs, swirls, and its ok, really - I trust we are all where we are supposed to be when we are there. If nothing else Bspot is a great journal!

The Mockingbird That Would Not Be Killed

For a few weeks, a mockingbird had been visiting me - she (perhaps) would sit on the top of the umbrella on my patio table and often stand on the patio and look into the house. I rather got a kick out watching her. Then a pair of birds would be chasing Psycho, the cat, across the top of the backyard fence. "Ah," I thought, "they have babies somewhere."

Offers of food and seed were ignored.

Several days ago, big Mama cat came in with a good sized bird in her mouth (I thought it was a mouse) and when we were able to take the bird, we noticed it was a baby Mockingbird. In the attempted capture, the cat caught the bird - twice. When baby was finally secured, he was placed in a shoe box. The next morning, my grandson opened the box to see if baby was still alive, and the bird took off and hid behind a China closet. We couldn't get it out as the furniture was too heavy.

Then, suddenly, the desperate screams of a bird, and I ran to the kitchen, and there it was, in the mouth of the cat AGAIN. I rescued the bird, and drove him to the Wildlife Sanctuary which was well-tucked away in an industrial section of town. The workers said a bird so attacked (three times) would rarely live. Sad, and on the way out of the sanctuary I was able to see a Great Horned Owl, which was an awe inspiring sight!

The following day I called the Sanctuary - the baby bird not only lived, but had already transited to a foster home that would nurture it until it could return to the wild. What a bird! What beautiful innocence and strength!

Then I turned inward and asked, what was the lesson of the Mockingbirds - ahhh, a humbling one: I turned to research and some Indian Lore - - - and found it, "Take note of what you are attracting and mimicking." Yes, I got it. It took me a long time. The Indians believe when one gets the "house visitors" it is often a message. I agree.

Hosanna

I have been wanting to paint these for about a year. When I realized Easter was around the corner, I painted them from a photo I took in the Caribbean and named the painting, "Hosanna" which means: Save/deliver me and I pray - and I don't know what the red line and white space is all about. Hey, Blogspot??? More later, I can not shake the red line. Just wanted to put the palms up in time for Palm Sunday.

Milestone

Just realized I've been so focused on art, etc., I haven't posted much of anything personal. This month we celebrated my oldest grandson's graduation from a well know tech school. He will be getting a really good job soon - which is major in this economy! In the mean time, he has been working the in best Mediterranean restaurant ever! I can't wait for more lamb shiskebob. Sorry, you vegetarians, I have been terribly backslidden.

We had company recently, Candy Minx and Stagg and I love them even more! Had such a good time getting to know them more and talking and talking. The top photo is Stagg with youngest grandson, who had surely found a hero!

Also had a short visit from a dear friend from Wyoming. Unfortunately it was when I somehow picked up something - a routine doctor visit, and he freaked, listening to my lungs, and, after some xrays and tests, I found out I had pneumonia and bronchitis - and, gee, I didn't even feel that bad. Have been running on energy highs, and in that mode, I forget I have a body. Anyway, the next day after the doc visit (I truly suspect a virus and allergies as I had started trimming bushes, pulling weeds, raking - spring yard work) I was REALLY sick - this is the third week and just starting to get better.

My sis is coming in May - hooray - I am so excited, we always have fun, and she needs to thaw her bones out!

Personally, I have been blue - weirdly blue. No explanation. Except the woes of the world hurt, and sometimes relationships hurt - but that is life, and doesn't really explain it all. Who knows. Only God, I think.

Anway - its warm now, yard work abounding, why did I whine for summer? I need to go lie in the sun - it is always healing.

Libyan Refugees

Charcoal 19" x 24"

Visitors

A long awaited visit from blog friends finally came to pass - Candy and Stagg on the beach! We had so much fun on Pensacola Beach and at home and everywhere we have gone.

We have shared art, talking and talking, and lives and thoughts. Hopefully they are resting and rejuvenating in the balmy breeze and mellow weather, though they have been working too hard, trimming orange trees and trying to make sense of (and accomplishing) an unruly garage.

I have finished a painting I'll post and also working on a charcoal - three monkeys. Also have taken on additional duties around the Gallery, and the Gallery is moving at the same time keeping up with featured artist shows, so its a really busy time. I have been selling which for an artist is wonderful, it gives validation that the work of one's soul and heart is appreciated by others. Yet, even without the sales, something about art that must come out or the maker becomes stifled and not whole. At least that is how it is for me.

Well, I'm taking grandson to school today and then going to the gallery to work a shift and then home again to see what is "cooking" with the my friends.

Spring is coming, so don't give up - !!!!! Soon we roll into March! Stay warm.

A Proper Pelican

Mostly done - this is the month everyone is painting Pelicans - so if one is art shopping, I suppose the motto is "pickapelican." Anyway got a whim to do one, just need to add his feet and do somemore on the water. I also finished a vendor of coconut milk in India, but have to upload him soon. I've been going through a tired period, don't know what that's all about. Everyone tells me its my schedule. Perhaps.

It gets really cold here, then a bit warmer, very dark days, then sunny ones. Another month and spring should hit!

Sorry I haven't been around more - sooooooooo tired - and trying to get some work sold, prices go up, but social security shrinks......

Folks, plan your retirement early. I know its very hard to save but even a little will be better than nothing. Life goes by very very fast. Sigh.

I Love Him

We were eating lunch one day and this little fellow sat on the back of the chair, his little head bobbling around looking over our table. We put some rice in a dish and he quickly came to dine with us. A friend of mine dubbed this drawing, "Innocent and Guilty."

Cello Player

Too cold to go out and play, so staying inside to play! I have to go out for a while and retrieve a package from Fed Ex that they sent to wrong address. I never found the package that the U.S. post office lost. They said they returned to to sender but won't tell me where it has been returned.

Grandson here sick. Whole family has been sick - I can't believe I have made it through so far with no sickness of my own. I guess someone has to stay on their feet!

The New Members Art Show went so well at the gallery - had so much fun! Will post photos tomorrow, hopefully or very soon. Grandson just gave me a list of "sick" supplies, Peppered Beef Jerky, Sunflower Seed, Cherries and Scratch off Lotto Tickets. Yeah, right, he wishes.

So, out in the cold I go - yesterday the cold being 44 degrees F - sorry folks, us southerners are "cold sissies."

2011 Coming Down

Reading list for 2011 - part of it anyway - I also have three Catholic books - one about the Theology of the Body

Also finished another painting - except for the glazing and taking care of the edges. It think this one needs prints made. It is much more beautiful than the lousy camera shot. I think I'll get prints made....

Preparing for New Years - a bottle of pink champagne a day -

Seriously, I will be slipping back into my roll of semi-normal housewife and grandma. Soon.

Next month I will be 66. Beware my friends. OR Celebrate! Midlife crisis can't even compare to the wonderful mid sixties!

Here's to the New year - Yay - come on! I'm ready with open arms!

PARTIAL READING LIST:

Love Morrison, Toni Ships from Alibris	Item charge:$0.99
	The Last Oracle Rollins, James Ships from Alibris	Item charge:$0.99
	Slammerkin Donoghue, Emma, Professor Ships from Alibris	Item charge:$0.99
Each item in this section ships direct from its seller. When you order multiple items, some may ship separately. They should arrive by Jan 17, 2011.
	The Wretched of the Earth Frantz Fanon Ships from Motor City Books	Item charge:$0.99
	Alfred Stieglitz: a Biography Richard Whelan, Jennifer Josephy Ships from Better World Books	Item charge:$0.99
	The Curse of Willie Lynch: How Social Engineering Iin the Year 1712 Continues to Affect African Americans Today Rollins, James Ships from BargainBookStores	Item charge:$9.14
	O'Keeffe and Stieglitz: an American Romance Benita Eisler Ships from thriftbooks.com

Holidays

Sliding into the New Year now! Didn't get many Christmas photos - we had sort of a weird Christmas. My youngest daughter and husband had the flu and over the long period they have been sick, they've had four emergency room visits combined, and Christmas was subdued - we went over and exchanged presents, and kept grandson with us to keep him from getting flu.

Then we loaded up Guido and went to oldest daughter's house in Mobile, where we had a warm fun time with the three grandkids and three dogs.

I've done much pondering about the last year - it was a year of incredible personal changes for me, and it's been like I can barely stay on the roller coaster, so to speak, as it has moved as quickly as a roller coaster. I almost feel wary about the coming year - how could much more transpire in the way of changes? Not only personally, but our world, everything is changing at a rapid pace.

Preparing now for a show at the gallery for the new artists. I have one done, The Owl and the Pussycat, and needless to say, I don't think I will ever tackle a painting of a peacock again. In fact, I've switched my plans and will take down photos of island life. The theme of the show is "Art and Soul." I also have to find one to donate for a silent auction which is all the thing in P'cola, art for charity.

I did have a blast, with youngest grandson's help with a "Paint the World with Hope and Healing" party Thursday before Christmas. It turned out amazingly well and it was like a Christmas present to me to see the kid's work - all were "creation" works.

Signing off now, as Blogspot is doing weird things............HAPPY NEW YEAR!

SosSs

Merry Christmas

The cats send their greetings too, but they aren't so willing to pose.

Love to all of you.

Update - December, year ending

Hello everyone. Yes, I'm so absent from Blogspot any more. And I'm half hearted with Facebook. I'm beginning to doubt the value of posting my feeling of the moment as I fear to appear as a bona fide manic depressive. This has been a really strange year - wonderful, but strange with the highest of highs, wonderful adventures, lowest of lows, and all stages in between.

I'm getting boring as all I can think about just about is painting or creating. The gallery has been a good move, though. I just sold the Pears yesterday at a good price!

One of these cages will fit over the Peacock in the painting I'm working on now...I'm using the one below as a model.

The Owl and Pussycat from Edward Lear's poem. I don't think it is quite finished, just don't know for sure what it needs for sure. So its at the maybe, but gotta study it phase.

My next grand attempt at painting will be this peacock. It sort of matches the Owl and the Pussycat - its been posted on Facebook - at any rate, here it is if you haven't seen it. After he's done, I'm taking one of the metal birdcages I have and impose it over him.

Christmas is one week away just about - no, not everything is done - but it will be what it will be.

Then 2011! If I don't get on before then, here is wishing everyone a wonderful Holiday.

Still Here!

What can I say? So much activity in the last year, so much happening, so many changes!

For the most part all is well, finishing up September flood mess, trying to get everything done I was supposed to do days and days ago.

Tonight watching Avatar with grandson. Wish I was built like one of those creatures - oh my! I would like to have the tail too - looks like it would be great balance. I would like to live in that beautiful psychedelic world too!

Yep, still daydeaming. One day dream has come true - my art is now in the Blue Morning Gallery.